Cultivating Romance in Marriage: How to Date Your Hubby


Cultivating Romance in Marriage: Part 1 - Pursue Simple JoyToday is the first installment of an exciting 5 part series! For the next 5 Friday's prepare to fall more madly in love with your hubby. If you're single, dating, or engaged, you can still glean wisdom from these truths in your everyday relationships. Make sure you pin these posts for later! I wish I had known what I'm about to share when I was single and dating. Stay tuned next week for Part 2 as we talk about keeping the spark alive with kids in tow!

Cultivating Romance in Marriage

I'll never forget the day Micah asked me to marry him. It was a complete surprise and I couldn't have been more thrilled with how God worked it all out.After the flurry of excitement and new found hope in our engagement, it was super easy to fall madly in love all over again to the man that asked me to be his forever.In hindsight, it was second nature for me to be romantic early on in our marriage, even with a looming deployment and an uncertain future in the military. I knew we had each other, and our long distance relationship was finally coming to an end. Cultivating romance early on in our marriage was a piece of cake because everything was still so fresh, new, and exciting.What I didn't know was that cultivating romance throughout marriage is a lot harder than I thought it would be! Marriage definitely has its ups and downs and is one of the most sanctifying experiences you will ever endure. It is also one of the most rewarding.[bctt tweet="Marriage is sanctifying but so rewarding." username="pursuesimplejoy"]As time flows swiftly on, I have fallen out of the habit of showing love in different ways to my hubby.

Cultivating Romance in Marriage: How to Date Your Hubby - Pursue Simple Joy

How to Date Your Hubby

Don't forget your wedding vows and what made you fall in love with the man you married in the first place!Love, cherish and appreciate each other as spouse, lover, and friend.  Love each other deeply with each passing day.

Always Kiss Goodnight

This one simple rule has helped our marriage in so many ways. Even on nights where we are still mad or hurt by something that happened earlier in the day, we always make it a point to lay it aside and kiss goodnight. This has helped defuse many a difficult situation.

Never Stop Holding Hands

This is still one of my favorite things to do when we're walking around. :)

Flirt With Each Other

Another one of my favorite things to do :) whether it's playing footsie under the table at a restaurant or poking each other in the sides while waiting in line, keep up the flirting! ;)

Try Something New Together

Go skydiving together! Learn how to cook gourmet food! Go snorkeling! Try out snowboarding! You get the picture :)

Consistent Date Nights

Date nights have admittedly become sporadic since TJ came along. This is something we've been working on being more intentional about! Consistent date nights give you something to look forward to. Guard that night to the best of your ability.

Never Let the Sun Go Down on Your Anger

Talk it out, communication is key. If we can't resolve an issue that night, we make it a priority to lay it aside until the next day and agree to disagree for the night. (See "Always Kiss Goodnight".) If I realize I'm still holding a grudge or being grumpy, it's usually because my pride is getting in the way![bctt tweet="Never the let the sun go down on your anger." username="pursuesimplejoy"]


Stop what you’re doing and pay full attention to the other when they’re speaking. I'm usually the one that struggles with this the most in our relationship.  I'm making it a point to put my phone down while having a conversation with someone and look them in the eye.

Don’t Sweat the Little Things

There always seems to be that little thing that annoys you. If you're anything like me, that little thing can take the joy out of your life. Pick your battles. Think to yourself, “Is this going to matter a year from now, a month from now, 5 minutes from now?”

Cultivate Your Spiritual Life

Pray together. Do a devotional and read God’s Word together. It's paramount for the spiritual welfare of your marriage. (Keep an eye out for part 3 as we discuss some awesome relationship and marriage resources!)

Always Keep God First

If you keep God as the foundation of your marriage, you will be able to weather any storm that comes your way. You'll see your spouse through God's eyes and love them more deeply and intimately.

Cultivating Romance in Marriage: How to Date Your Hubby - Pursue Simple Joy

The Romance Doesn't Have to Die in Marriage

Did you read over this list and get discouraged? Take heart! You are armed with some nifty tools that you can implement today in order to start dating your spouse again. I am by no means an expert but I make sure to keep God and my marriage a priority.Remember, you got married for the long haul! Pray over your marriage daily. Implementing these little nuggets of romance will help you as you continue to grow and love each other with each passing day.The Lord will be with you every step on your marriage journey.  Keep Him first and everything will fall into place.It is my hope and prayer that our Heavenly Father will guide, sustain and grow you closer together as a couple and with Him through these years you have ahead.

What are some of your favorite tips for keeping the romance alive in your marriage? I'd love to hear them!